Despite Complaint Over Penis Picture, Judicial Candidate Has Stellar Resume




I first heard Stacey Schulman’s name from a political consultant while we ate lunch.

The consultant said Schulman was running for judge next year.

“She is the perfect judicial candidate,” the consultant said.

I left lunch juiced on the idea of “the perfect judicial candidate.”  I had to meet her.

Then family matters and freelance work intervened to push Schulman out of my mind for several months.

Until she called.

We met for coffee.


Stacey Schulman

Stacey Schulman


The perfect candidate? That remains to be seen.

A good, maybe even great candidate. Definitely.

In Broward, where sadly too many judicial candidates are mediocre, Schulman will stand out.

She hasn’t filed for office yet, but will before the end of the summer for an open seat. She said she won’t run against an incumbent judge.

Her one shortcoming is her age.  She is 36, married with two children.

In those 36 years she has packed more than many lawyers twice her age:

*A Cornell graduate and Number One in her University of Miami Law School class.

*Nine years as one of State Attorney Mike Satz’s prosecutors, handling roughly 80 trials for charges ranging from capital sex battery to attempted murder.

*A year at Morgan & Morgan (Charlie Crist’s law firm), representing employees who had been the victims of unfair labor practices.

*Since June, 2012, commercial litigator at Greenspoon Marder.

That’s a solid resume, with both civil and criminal experience. I’ve seen many candidates, some of them now on the bench, whose experience was threadbare compared to Schulman.

But that’s not all.

Here are other reasons why political consultants believe next Election Year looks great for Schulman:

*Schulman has the resources to pay for a countywide campaign.

Her father, David Schulman, is what’s known as a Jewish community macher. That’s Yiddish for someone who is important or can get things done.

David Schulman is an insurance executive and the past president of the local Jewish Federation.  He remains on the Federation Board, along with his daughter Stacey


Will Borat Campaign?


Her brother Todd Schulman is a key member of Sacha Baron Cohen’s (“Borat,” “Bruno”) movie production team.

Will the Cohen bring some Hollywood glam to the campaign?

The controversial star may not be a suitable celebrity to campaign for a judicial candidate, but movie industry money won’t hurt.

*Schulman should sell well to the average Jewish voter, who still comprise a large bloc in Broward. Her work for abused workers will interest the unions.  Her ties to Satz varnish her campaign with a law-and-order patina.

*Schulman says she has signed Florida’s Obama For America head Ashley Walker to be in overall charge of the campaign.  The two women are long-time friends.  Walker will most likely farm out the day-to-day work to other consultants, who must be drooling for a piece of what is sure to be a well-funded campaign.

*Schulman is a serial networker and has been her whole life. Over the years, she seems to have touched base with many who count in Broward politics.

*Schulman has a long career of activism and has touched many people in Broward. The first mention of her in the Sun-Sentinel is when she was organizing an award for her elementary school teacher. For the past 11 years, she has been a volunteer for the National Multiple Sclerosis Society (Her mother Carrie, who is also a leader in Federation,  has MS.).

*Last but not least, Schulman is smart, driven and attractive.

She is motivated enough to put in the grueling days of campaigning in a county bigger than many states. Smart? Voters don’t want dumb judges.

Attractive? Now that’s in the eye of the beholder.  There is no doubt that Schulman is more appealing than many of the judicial candidates.

I’m not bring this up because I am sexist.  I am bring it up because numerous university studies indicate that attractive candidates are more appealing to voters.

(Schulman wears glasses and often pulls her hair back to make herself look older and more judicial.)

One more notable piece of her past she left off her resume.


A Dick Joke That’s Not Funny


Although Schulman didn’t mention it when asked about possible baggage she is carrying, a cursory search of the Internet found that she was once disqualified from a case by a federal judge.

The opposing attorney complained that her jerky co-counsel Richard Celler draw pictures of a penis and played Angry Birds during depositions and had unethical conversations with parties to the case.

It was the ex parte conversations that got Celler and his employee Stacey Schulman thrown off the case.

“The Court finds that in the instant case, the relationship between Celler, Defendants, and Defendants’ counsel has been so impaired that the only proper remedy is Celler’s disqualification,” state the judge’s order.

But it is the penis pictures and the Angry Bird that propels this complaint into the public realm.

A witness “testified that during depositions he witnessed “Mr. Celler . . . drawing photos of — pictures of male genitalia and showing them to Ms. Schulman…(and)observed Schulman “laugh[ing] quite a few times” at Celler’s drawings..During (one) deposition Mr. Celler was playing the game Angry Birds. He admitted it aloud and was bragging that he had just beaten somebody in Minnesota at the game during the deposition.” (Id. 17:6–9). Moreover, Celler would wear a t- shirt and shorts to proceedings to gain ‘a psychological advantage.’ (Id. 17:11–15). Celler chose Dunkin’ Donuts as the site of depositions against Coupal’s wishes.” 

The immature co-counsel was accused of being “systematically engaged in inappropriate and offensive behavior” and Schulman got dragged down by her boss when the firm was disqualified!

Schulman immediately left Morgan & Morgan because she felt she could no longer work with Celler.  She got a job immediately at Greenspoon Marder, proving the legal community blamed her boss for the ethical lapses and not her.

Broward voters have elected to the bench as late as 2012 lawyers accused of wrongdoing much worse than Schulman’s laughing at a dick joke.

One victorious candidate in the last cycle had a Bar complaint concerning shenanigans with hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Will the penis picture that misfired offset Schulman’s stellar resume?

That’s up the voters.

Still, unquestionably and despite her age, Schulman is a candidate that deserves serious consideration.



13 Responses to “Despite Complaint Over Penis Picture, Judicial Candidate Has Stellar Resume”

  1. Adriana Alcalde says:

    Stacey is an amazing lawyer, and she will make a great judge. I went to law school with her and was her co worker at the State Attorney’s office for many years- there is no hesitation in recommending her! I hope she is successful in this endeavor because she deserves it, but even more the people deserve a judge like her.

  2. Ha Ha Ha says:

    Buddy, give your readers the whole story. Let’s see these penis pictures.

    Not that there’s anything wrong with either making, drawing or laughing at penis jokes – but why not give a full, complete report (journalism 101) & also liven up the blog at the same time?

    If you just can’t publish the whole story because of the lingering effects of a censored career at the Sun-Sentinel, then just pass the images along to Chaz…


    The pictures are not part of the court file. I doubt whether they still exist.

  3. Judicial Handicapper says:

    Looking at the open seats right now, the only one with one candidate is Julie Shapiro Harris. She lost last time to Judge Rothschild.

    With Judge Henning staying, there are no other open seats coming open anytime soon.

    Shulman vs Harris makes an interesting match up of two strong Jewish female candidates.

  4. Buddy you're better than this says:

    OK, unless there is something missing in what you’ve printed, she did not make any “penis jokes.” Apparently all she is guilty of is having the misfortune of being paired with an immature asshole who liked to draw dicks. And, what, she laughed at his pictures? That is a penis joke? Not in my book.

    Now, I don’t know Ms. Shulman, nor do I have a dog in any judicial fights, but it troubles me when the headline of a blog article is so misleading, and when you are attempting to imply that this candidate-to-be was thrown off a case by making dick jokes, when, according to your own writing, it appears that the co-counsel was himself a dick, and they both got thrown off a case because of the actions of the dick co-counsel’s actions, not her own.


    She is alleged to have laughed at what was intended to be a joke. A joke is defined as something that is designed to make one laugh. “Something said or done to provoke laughter,” according to Merriam-Webster.

    Thus, “penis joke.”

    However, you caused me to think about it and I like the alliteration of “Penis Picture.” So I changed it.

  5. Chaz Stevens, Militant Atheist says:


    The answer seems painfully clear…

    Round up some penis pictures, put ’em in a line up, and see if Stacey can point out the offending appendage.

    To be fair, if these are white penises, keep out the brothers (and myself)… Don’t want to skew the results.

    And as your earlier commenter accurately noted, MAOS will gladly post the offending pictures.

    We have a long history of posting photos of cocks — starting with Steve Gonot and most recently, the Coconut Creek Police Chief (Michael Mann).

    * Keeping my fingers crossed this comment makes it past the Beat’s Standards and Practices folks.

  6. PCU says:

    Hey hey, ho ho, this penis party’s got to go.

  7. Be careful what you wish for says:

    Nice job, Buddy your better…

    Penis Pics while more accurate is not better than the previous title. To paraphrase and update Mark Twain, don’t nitpick the guy who pushes the enter button to put up a blog post, lol.

    People will read the article and see what a great person and future candidate Ms. Schulman is for themselves. Better for Ms. Schulman, the title will attract more readers who will see the positives of the article and not that issue. If the title of this article is her biggest campaign problem, she will be Judge without issue.

    Ms.Schulman to get press at all before she has even entered a race is rare. Being a judicial candidate rarely brings press unless you do something wrong.

    This piece is a great bio of a great future judicial candidate.

  8. Hey Chaz says:

    Not to worry.
    Stacey has already seen your pics.
    That’s why she was laughing.

  9. Courthouse Observer says:

    Stacey Schulman would make a great judge. She’s smart and dedicated to the law. The problem at Morgan & Morgan was totally the result of another attorney.

  10. Y. R. says:

    You have insulted a fine woman. Fortunately people can see through your attacks.

  11. Ha Ha Ha says:

    Hmmm… will we see a debate between judicial candidates in which Schulman’s opponent shows her a few Internet photographs of world record holder Jonah Falcon?


    I had no idea who Jonah Falcon was so I looked him up. Apparently he is known as a guy with a large penis. Here is his Wikipedia entry:

  12. Erica says:

    Alot of you seem fixatd on the penis aspect of this story. That is very telling of what you must be lacking. Just sayn’.
    Stacey Schulman is a breath of fresh air and an excellent candidate for judge.

  13. Christine says:


    Just go on and and enjoy the ride.