BY SAM FIELDS
Miami attorney Mikki Canton is one dumb bitch.
Was that uncivil? Absolutely.
And if Canton has her way I will be dragged into the Civility Court that she has proposed. There I could be fined and/or forced to perform community service for being rude, crude and lewd.
Canton, , a muckety muck in the office of Miami Mayor Thomas Regalado, has gone so far as to pitch the idea to the Miami Herald Editorial Board.
According to Canton, America, and South Florida in particular, is facing a crisis of incivility at least as important as rising seas and the Zika virus.
The most recent incident that ticked off Canton was some jerk at a Coral Gables Starbucks who decided his slow service was because he is White and a Trump supporter. He then proceeded to announce it loud and clear that the Black “barrista” was dissing him.
How about kicking the guy out of the store with a “trespass notice” that would criminalize his unwanted return?
I don’t know if Canton’s idea is going to get legs. But if it does, consider the following requirements:
- Amending the Constitution to eliminate the “free speech” clause of the First Amendment.
- Since this is a civil court and not a criminal court, and enforced “community service” is a form of “involuntary servitude”, we would also have to amend the Thirteenth Amendment. While outlawing slavery, it carved out an “involuntary servitude” exception–but ONLY in criminal cases.
- Instruct the Florida Department of Motor Vehicles that, upon issuing or renewing driver’s licenses, they will be required to amputate the driver’s middle finger on the left hand.
- Issue arrest warrants for the two Donalds…Trump and Rickles.